Be the Light in My Lantern, chapter 14
Dec. 4th, 2014 05:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
starfishstarBE THE LIGHT IN MY LANTERN
Summary: In which Remus and Tonks fight battles, arrest criminals, befriend werewolves, overcome inner demons and, despite it all, find themselves a happy ending. A love story, and a story of the Order years. (At long last, my Remus/Tonks epic, which has been years in the making!)
Chapter 14: A Little Hope
When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened
But in my dreams, I slew the dragon
–Colin Hay, Waiting for My Real Life to Begin
Remus started at the cracking of a twig, then relaxed as Tonks' familiar shape emerged out of the gloom.
She squeezed his shoulder when she reached him. "Sorry," she whispered. "Should have seen that twig, I know. Everything okay here?"
He nodded. "And you?"
"Yeah. Just wanted to make sure you were okay. Two more hours, by the way, 'til Emmeline and Hestia take over."
Remus nodded again; Tonks gave him a quick kiss and melted back into the night.
The last couple weeks had been exciting for her (Auror missions, stakeouts, near arrests) and frustrating for him (far too little he could do to help, and he missed Tonks’ company more than he cared to admit when she was so busy, though he would never dream of trying to hold her back from her work). Left alone again with his thoughts, Remus surveyed the quiet, shadowy woods around him. No, they weren't technically on Lucius Malfoy's property, but Malfoy would still have cause to be angry if he were to find them there.
Knowledge, as Dumbledore kept reminding them, was key, and simply knowing who was where and talking to whom could put them a small step ahead. So they watched the individuals most likely to be in contact with the Azkaban escapees, took shifts, wore themselves thin.
Perhaps when Emmeline and Hestia came to take the next surveillance shift, Remus and Tonks would be able to catch a few hours' sleep before the next busy day began.
Quietly and carefully, Remus paced a bit further away from the wall that enclosed the Malfoys' property, far enough back to see over the wall to the lights of the manor. A family like the Malfoys would have all sorts of charms in place to prevent intruders from simply Apparating onto their property, so it wasn't unreasonable to think their visitors might approach from outside the grounds. Then again, it also wasn't particularly reasonable to think they were going to catch any Death Eaters this way. Remus paced closer to the wall again.
Then he heard a sound like a badger chittering a bit further out in the woods and stiffened. Only Tonks, he'd thought fondly when she'd suggested it, would choose that as a warning signal, and he'd chuckled when she'd demonstrated the noise. Now he would rather have heard anything but that.
He ran towards the noise and found Tonks in a small clearing, hooded figures closing in from all directions.
"Remus!" she shouted, face alight. "Back to back with me!"
For one terrible second, Remus froze. What if he didn't remember how to do this? What if he failed her?
Then muscle memory took over. Duelling stance, back to back with their shoulder blades just touching. The same as he'd done countless times with James or Sirius.
The hexes were already flying fast from behind the Death Eaters' masks as they closed into a circle, about five or six of them, though it was hard to say when Remus couldn't see exactly how many were behind him, battling Tonks on the other side of the circle.
Remus parried and dodged, deflecting curses from three of them at once. He could hear Tonks shouting shield charms and counter-curses, her voice fearless, as she kept step with him.
Tonks danced them sideways as a Stunner whooshed past both their ears. Remus blocked a Blasting Curse from the Death Eater directly in front of him, then a Stinging Hex and a Stunning Spell from the other two at once. They didn't seem to be aiming to kill, which was interesting, although not necessarily good. It might well be that they had instructions to bring back anyone they found, to be tortured for information.
Another hex of some kind brushed Remus' shoulder, but there was no time to think about the pain. "Towards those trees," Tonks gasped in his ear. "For a little more cover – on three –"
She counted to three and they barrelled in the direction she'd indicated, still back to back, with well-placed hexes forcing their opponents to retreat out of their way. But even under the relative cover of the stand of trees, the Death Eaters were only a few steps behind them, intensifying their curses and starting to reform their circle.
"It's no good," Tonks yelled over the whizzing and banging. "We're outnumbered. Apparate, follow me –" She grabbed his arm and the last thing Remus saw was a jet of green light shooting past Tonks' head as she dragged him into nothingness.
They landed somewhere cold and dark and mercifully quiet. Remus bent over with his hands on his knees and gasped for breath.
Tonks was muttering furiously somewhere beside him. "Damn it, damn it, damn it," she raged. "We always get that close and then have to give up. Why are they always a step ahead of us? Malfoy must have told them to sweep for intruders, damn it. We have to warn Emmeline and Hestia, I'll send them a message, Dumbledore too –"
He heard the whisper of her Patronus disappearing into the night, and still Remus couldn't bring himself to stand up straight. He was shaking.
"Remus?" came Tonks' voice, and her hand on his arm. The moonless night was so dark, he could barely make out her face in front of him. "Are you okay? You're not hurt, are you?"
He finally stood and looked at her, drinking in what little he could see of her face. "No," he managed. "I'm fine." There was a twinge in his shoulder, but it didn't seem to be anything more than a graze.
Tonks expelled a frustrated sigh. "I hate letting them get away."
"You did the right thing," Remus said, fighting the urge to crush her into his arms. Two against six, had it been? And that last jet of light had been a Killing Curse. What if –
Tonks gave a little self-deprecating laugh. "And this was the first place I thought of, where they wouldn't think to look. You know where we are?"
Remus realised the stubbly winter field did seem familiar.
"Dora, I don't think we should be assigned to the same missions anymore," he told her, trying to keep his voice steady. "I just – if something were to happen to you –"
"It's a war, Remus," Tonks answered quietly. "We knew what we were getting into."
"I know." He couldn't seem to express what he meant. "I know, and I'm not telling you not to fight. But I'm afraid – I can't stand to watch – What if I were the one to fail you? To make the one mistake that put you in danger?"
To his surprise, Tonks didn't argue, just nodded brusquely. "That's fine. The last thing I'd want is for you to be distracted in battle because of me. We can tell Dumbledore."
Her matter-of-fact Auror tone was killing him. "Dora," he said, and then he couldn't fight it anymore. He reached out and pulled her to him.
Her arms came around him and squeezed. "Remus. What's the matter?"
"This is all in a day's work for you," he murmured against her cheek. "But having to see you in battle terrifies me more even than I could have imagined."
Tonks hugged him tighter. "Don't worry about me," she whispered fiercely. "I'm a damn good Auror. They're not going to get me."
"I hope that very, very much."
She kissed his throat, the place closest and easiest to reach at the moment. "Come on, let's get out of this field and back to Grimmauld Place. We need to start figuring out what to do now that the Death Eaters are onto our little surveillance plan."
Tonks took his hand and Remus allowed her to lead him in Apparation for the second time that night, wondering and terrified at the emotions pounding in his chest.
– – – – –
The next Monday morning, Remus and Tonks were both in the kitchen at 12 Grimmauld Place – she had stayed the night there for the first time, under cover of the fact that everyone would be turning up early for an Order meeting anyway – when Arthur Weasley stepped in, beaming, a rolled-up magazine in his hand.
Tonks had been leaning companionably against Remus' shoulder as they fried up some eggs for anyone who arrived to the meeting early and hungry, and Remus shot her a subtle warning glance as Arthur came in. He felt a stab of guilt as hurt flashed across her face for just a second before she deftly hid it, stepping away from him and turning to grin at Arthur.
"Wait until you two see this," Arthur cried. "Molly's fit to be tied, but it's enormously brave of him. Look at this."
He laid the magazine on the table and gestured for Tonks to look.
"The Quibbler?" she asked sceptically.
Arthur pointed at the headline, which Remus could read clearly even from his position at the kitchen's old-fashioned range:
HARRY POTTER SPEAKS OUT AT LAST
Remus forgot about the eggs and hurried to join the other two at the table.
"It's brilliant," Arthur declared. "Read it, read it, he tells the whole story, very sober, very believable. This is really going to throw the Ministry for a loop."
Remus dropped into a chair and opened the magazine to Harry's interview. Tonks read over his shoulder, occasionally stepping away to stir the eggs.
Remus looked up when he'd finished reading, and Arthur grinned.
"Never afraid to make waves, is he, our Harry?" Arthur said.
"No," Remus agreed with a touch of pride he couldn't quite keep out of his voice. "He really isn't." He glanced towards Tonks, hoping to share a smile over what they'd just read, but she was busy at the range.
Arthur pulled up a chair and looked at Remus, his expression now sober. "You know things are getting worse at the school, don't you? Umbridge is cracking down – she's desperate for power. Did you two hear she's put Hagrid on probation?"
"What?" Tonks cried indignantly, turning to look at Arthur. "Why Hagrid?"
"Why do you think? He's too close to Dumbledore."
Tonks ground her teeth in frustration. Remus scanned the Quibbler interview again, thinking about Harry and the worsening conditions at Hogwarts. "He'll be in trouble for this," he murmured.
"And he'll have known that full well when he decided to do it," Arthur said. "I told you Molly was upset – she thinks he should be keeping out of trouble, not landing himself in it."
"And what do you think?" Remus asked, realising even as he said it that this was something hardly anyone ever asked Arthur. Molly tended to have enough opinions for both of them.
Arthur gave the question careful consideration. "I think Harry knows what he's doing," he said finally. "This could be a turning point, really turn public opinion back our way." He gave Remus a little commiserating nod, knowing how much of his time Remus spent trying to convince others of their cause, to so little effect. "I think he'll find it was worth it."
Remus nodded. "I hope he does. Especially since I can only imagine what Umbridge will try to do to him when she finds out."
"Think we need to go up there and keep an eye out?" Tonks asked Remus from the range, where she was transferring the eggs to a plate, her earlier pique superseded by concern for Harry.
If he was being honest, there was nothing Remus would like more than swoop into Hogwarts and stand guard over Harry every moment. Or perhaps just take him away and hide him somewhere until the war was over. But that wasn't how this worked.
He sighed. "I think we should trust Dumbledore to let us know if our help is needed."
Tonks sighed too, but nodded and brought the plate to the table, as other members of the Order started to trickle in.
– – – – –
"Do things seem a little different to you?" Tonks asked him a few days later.
Remus had been away. Not a full moon trip – he'd very nearly exhausted all possible werewolf contacts at this point – but the usual reconnaissance for Dumbledore, talking to people in pubs and quiet corners, trying to feel out possible supporters without scaring them off.
He'd agreed to come straight to Tonks' flat when he got back, but now he was wondering if he shouldn't have done so. He hated the idea of a tail following him back here, no matter how much logic told him that was nearly impossible, given the number of times he'd re-Apparated to neutral locations along the way. But 12 Grimmauld Place was at least under a Fidelius Charm and unplottable, while the Order's personal residences weren't.
"Different how?" he asked now. "Different, in that we've finally had two days in a row that weren't overcast? Different, in that the Chudley Cannons had a winning match?"
"You're being silly." Tonks rolled her eyes, nudging him back towards his side of the bed.
"Whose influence is that, I wonder?" He kissed her nose. No, on second thought, he wouldn't have been able to keep from coming here.
Tonks lost any space gain she'd achieved when she'd pushed him towards the other side of the bed by promptly joining him there. "No, I mean, do people seem more receptive? A little more willing to accept what we're saying, Harry's side of the story?"
Remus nodded. "I think you're right. They're still scared, but they're listening." He propped himself up on one elbow, so he could see Tonks better. "Why, are people in the Ministry starting to talk?"
"Mm-hm. Very quietly, of course, because they could get in a lot of trouble. But already I've heard a couple of the Aurors saying Harry could have a point. And that's Aurors, Remus. The Ministry leans on us really hard to toe the line."
He smiled at her eager, earnest face. "I'm glad to hear it."
"It makes me feel like we could still win," she whispered. "When sometimes it's so hard to believe that. That's just like Harry, isn't it, to be giving all of us hope?"
– – – – –
It had been a long day. Remus brushed his cloak dry of outside's dismal drizzle as best he could and hung it up in the hallway. They'd finally got around to installing some coat hooks and tossing out that hideous troll's leg umbrella stand – Tonks' influence on the house, he thought with a smile.
Remus thought he'd go down to the kitchen and see if Sirius was around and up for a cup of tea and a bit of company, though lately Sirius had been retreating into the upper recesses of the house more and more. Just thinking about Sirius’ unhappiness in this house made the weight of the day press a little heavier on Remus' shoulders.
He took his time making his way downstairs, lost in thought, but when he reached the foot of the stairs, Remus stopped short.
Yes, Sirius was in the kitchen. So were Tonks and Molly and Arthur, though perhaps that wasn't so unusual, since they were all frequent visitors to the house.
But Kingsley and Moody were there too, all of them grouped around the table. On which a large, phoenix-shaped cake was ablaze with candles.
They were all looking at Remus. And smiling.
Remus' eyes went first to Tonks, who could barely contain her delight. "Oh, don't tell us you actually forgot what day it is!" she burst out, grinning madly.
Oh. It was the 10th of March.
"I – don't know what to say," Remus said.
As if that were the cue they had been waiting for, everyone in the room burst into a chorus of "Happy Birthday."
Feeling as if he were in a dream, Remus drifted towards the table. The men slapped him on the back, Molly enfolded him in a hug and Tonks gave him a friendly, chaste squeeze on the arm.
"Come on, make a wish," she urged. "And don't look at me, the cake was all Molly, you know I can't bake worth anything."
Remus looked down at the cake, then up at his friends, all watching him expectantly. Even Sirius looked content in this moment.
"Thank you for this," he said to them all.
"Just blow out the candles, old man," Sirius smirked. "No need to get sentimental on us." Sirius always had been able to scent a Remus Earnest Moment coming a mile off.
Remus looked in turn at each of their familiar faces, lit up with joy and love. Then he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and wished very hard for things to stay like this. Just like this.
– – – – –
(continue to CHAPTER FIFTEEN...)
Summary: In which Remus and Tonks fight battles, arrest criminals, befriend werewolves, overcome inner demons and, despite it all, find themselves a happy ending. A love story, and a story of the Order years. (At long last, my Remus/Tonks epic, which has been years in the making!)
Chapter 14: A Little Hope
When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened
But in my dreams, I slew the dragon
–Colin Hay, Waiting for My Real Life to Begin
Remus started at the cracking of a twig, then relaxed as Tonks' familiar shape emerged out of the gloom.
She squeezed his shoulder when she reached him. "Sorry," she whispered. "Should have seen that twig, I know. Everything okay here?"
He nodded. "And you?"
"Yeah. Just wanted to make sure you were okay. Two more hours, by the way, 'til Emmeline and Hestia take over."
Remus nodded again; Tonks gave him a quick kiss and melted back into the night.
The last couple weeks had been exciting for her (Auror missions, stakeouts, near arrests) and frustrating for him (far too little he could do to help, and he missed Tonks’ company more than he cared to admit when she was so busy, though he would never dream of trying to hold her back from her work). Left alone again with his thoughts, Remus surveyed the quiet, shadowy woods around him. No, they weren't technically on Lucius Malfoy's property, but Malfoy would still have cause to be angry if he were to find them there.
Knowledge, as Dumbledore kept reminding them, was key, and simply knowing who was where and talking to whom could put them a small step ahead. So they watched the individuals most likely to be in contact with the Azkaban escapees, took shifts, wore themselves thin.
Perhaps when Emmeline and Hestia came to take the next surveillance shift, Remus and Tonks would be able to catch a few hours' sleep before the next busy day began.
Quietly and carefully, Remus paced a bit further away from the wall that enclosed the Malfoys' property, far enough back to see over the wall to the lights of the manor. A family like the Malfoys would have all sorts of charms in place to prevent intruders from simply Apparating onto their property, so it wasn't unreasonable to think their visitors might approach from outside the grounds. Then again, it also wasn't particularly reasonable to think they were going to catch any Death Eaters this way. Remus paced closer to the wall again.
Then he heard a sound like a badger chittering a bit further out in the woods and stiffened. Only Tonks, he'd thought fondly when she'd suggested it, would choose that as a warning signal, and he'd chuckled when she'd demonstrated the noise. Now he would rather have heard anything but that.
He ran towards the noise and found Tonks in a small clearing, hooded figures closing in from all directions.
"Remus!" she shouted, face alight. "Back to back with me!"
For one terrible second, Remus froze. What if he didn't remember how to do this? What if he failed her?
Then muscle memory took over. Duelling stance, back to back with their shoulder blades just touching. The same as he'd done countless times with James or Sirius.
The hexes were already flying fast from behind the Death Eaters' masks as they closed into a circle, about five or six of them, though it was hard to say when Remus couldn't see exactly how many were behind him, battling Tonks on the other side of the circle.
Remus parried and dodged, deflecting curses from three of them at once. He could hear Tonks shouting shield charms and counter-curses, her voice fearless, as she kept step with him.
Tonks danced them sideways as a Stunner whooshed past both their ears. Remus blocked a Blasting Curse from the Death Eater directly in front of him, then a Stinging Hex and a Stunning Spell from the other two at once. They didn't seem to be aiming to kill, which was interesting, although not necessarily good. It might well be that they had instructions to bring back anyone they found, to be tortured for information.
Another hex of some kind brushed Remus' shoulder, but there was no time to think about the pain. "Towards those trees," Tonks gasped in his ear. "For a little more cover – on three –"
She counted to three and they barrelled in the direction she'd indicated, still back to back, with well-placed hexes forcing their opponents to retreat out of their way. But even under the relative cover of the stand of trees, the Death Eaters were only a few steps behind them, intensifying their curses and starting to reform their circle.
"It's no good," Tonks yelled over the whizzing and banging. "We're outnumbered. Apparate, follow me –" She grabbed his arm and the last thing Remus saw was a jet of green light shooting past Tonks' head as she dragged him into nothingness.
They landed somewhere cold and dark and mercifully quiet. Remus bent over with his hands on his knees and gasped for breath.
Tonks was muttering furiously somewhere beside him. "Damn it, damn it, damn it," she raged. "We always get that close and then have to give up. Why are they always a step ahead of us? Malfoy must have told them to sweep for intruders, damn it. We have to warn Emmeline and Hestia, I'll send them a message, Dumbledore too –"
He heard the whisper of her Patronus disappearing into the night, and still Remus couldn't bring himself to stand up straight. He was shaking.
"Remus?" came Tonks' voice, and her hand on his arm. The moonless night was so dark, he could barely make out her face in front of him. "Are you okay? You're not hurt, are you?"
He finally stood and looked at her, drinking in what little he could see of her face. "No," he managed. "I'm fine." There was a twinge in his shoulder, but it didn't seem to be anything more than a graze.
Tonks expelled a frustrated sigh. "I hate letting them get away."
"You did the right thing," Remus said, fighting the urge to crush her into his arms. Two against six, had it been? And that last jet of light had been a Killing Curse. What if –
Tonks gave a little self-deprecating laugh. "And this was the first place I thought of, where they wouldn't think to look. You know where we are?"
Remus realised the stubbly winter field did seem familiar.
"Dora, I don't think we should be assigned to the same missions anymore," he told her, trying to keep his voice steady. "I just – if something were to happen to you –"
"It's a war, Remus," Tonks answered quietly. "We knew what we were getting into."
"I know." He couldn't seem to express what he meant. "I know, and I'm not telling you not to fight. But I'm afraid – I can't stand to watch – What if I were the one to fail you? To make the one mistake that put you in danger?"
To his surprise, Tonks didn't argue, just nodded brusquely. "That's fine. The last thing I'd want is for you to be distracted in battle because of me. We can tell Dumbledore."
Her matter-of-fact Auror tone was killing him. "Dora," he said, and then he couldn't fight it anymore. He reached out and pulled her to him.
Her arms came around him and squeezed. "Remus. What's the matter?"
"This is all in a day's work for you," he murmured against her cheek. "But having to see you in battle terrifies me more even than I could have imagined."
Tonks hugged him tighter. "Don't worry about me," she whispered fiercely. "I'm a damn good Auror. They're not going to get me."
"I hope that very, very much."
She kissed his throat, the place closest and easiest to reach at the moment. "Come on, let's get out of this field and back to Grimmauld Place. We need to start figuring out what to do now that the Death Eaters are onto our little surveillance plan."
Tonks took his hand and Remus allowed her to lead him in Apparation for the second time that night, wondering and terrified at the emotions pounding in his chest.
– – – – –
The next Monday morning, Remus and Tonks were both in the kitchen at 12 Grimmauld Place – she had stayed the night there for the first time, under cover of the fact that everyone would be turning up early for an Order meeting anyway – when Arthur Weasley stepped in, beaming, a rolled-up magazine in his hand.
Tonks had been leaning companionably against Remus' shoulder as they fried up some eggs for anyone who arrived to the meeting early and hungry, and Remus shot her a subtle warning glance as Arthur came in. He felt a stab of guilt as hurt flashed across her face for just a second before she deftly hid it, stepping away from him and turning to grin at Arthur.
"Wait until you two see this," Arthur cried. "Molly's fit to be tied, but it's enormously brave of him. Look at this."
He laid the magazine on the table and gestured for Tonks to look.
"The Quibbler?" she asked sceptically.
Arthur pointed at the headline, which Remus could read clearly even from his position at the kitchen's old-fashioned range:
HARRY POTTER SPEAKS OUT AT LAST
Remus forgot about the eggs and hurried to join the other two at the table.
"It's brilliant," Arthur declared. "Read it, read it, he tells the whole story, very sober, very believable. This is really going to throw the Ministry for a loop."
Remus dropped into a chair and opened the magazine to Harry's interview. Tonks read over his shoulder, occasionally stepping away to stir the eggs.
Remus looked up when he'd finished reading, and Arthur grinned.
"Never afraid to make waves, is he, our Harry?" Arthur said.
"No," Remus agreed with a touch of pride he couldn't quite keep out of his voice. "He really isn't." He glanced towards Tonks, hoping to share a smile over what they'd just read, but she was busy at the range.
Arthur pulled up a chair and looked at Remus, his expression now sober. "You know things are getting worse at the school, don't you? Umbridge is cracking down – she's desperate for power. Did you two hear she's put Hagrid on probation?"
"What?" Tonks cried indignantly, turning to look at Arthur. "Why Hagrid?"
"Why do you think? He's too close to Dumbledore."
Tonks ground her teeth in frustration. Remus scanned the Quibbler interview again, thinking about Harry and the worsening conditions at Hogwarts. "He'll be in trouble for this," he murmured.
"And he'll have known that full well when he decided to do it," Arthur said. "I told you Molly was upset – she thinks he should be keeping out of trouble, not landing himself in it."
"And what do you think?" Remus asked, realising even as he said it that this was something hardly anyone ever asked Arthur. Molly tended to have enough opinions for both of them.
Arthur gave the question careful consideration. "I think Harry knows what he's doing," he said finally. "This could be a turning point, really turn public opinion back our way." He gave Remus a little commiserating nod, knowing how much of his time Remus spent trying to convince others of their cause, to so little effect. "I think he'll find it was worth it."
Remus nodded. "I hope he does. Especially since I can only imagine what Umbridge will try to do to him when she finds out."
"Think we need to go up there and keep an eye out?" Tonks asked Remus from the range, where she was transferring the eggs to a plate, her earlier pique superseded by concern for Harry.
If he was being honest, there was nothing Remus would like more than swoop into Hogwarts and stand guard over Harry every moment. Or perhaps just take him away and hide him somewhere until the war was over. But that wasn't how this worked.
He sighed. "I think we should trust Dumbledore to let us know if our help is needed."
Tonks sighed too, but nodded and brought the plate to the table, as other members of the Order started to trickle in.
– – – – –
"Do things seem a little different to you?" Tonks asked him a few days later.
Remus had been away. Not a full moon trip – he'd very nearly exhausted all possible werewolf contacts at this point – but the usual reconnaissance for Dumbledore, talking to people in pubs and quiet corners, trying to feel out possible supporters without scaring them off.
He'd agreed to come straight to Tonks' flat when he got back, but now he was wondering if he shouldn't have done so. He hated the idea of a tail following him back here, no matter how much logic told him that was nearly impossible, given the number of times he'd re-Apparated to neutral locations along the way. But 12 Grimmauld Place was at least under a Fidelius Charm and unplottable, while the Order's personal residences weren't.
"Different how?" he asked now. "Different, in that we've finally had two days in a row that weren't overcast? Different, in that the Chudley Cannons had a winning match?"
"You're being silly." Tonks rolled her eyes, nudging him back towards his side of the bed.
"Whose influence is that, I wonder?" He kissed her nose. No, on second thought, he wouldn't have been able to keep from coming here.
Tonks lost any space gain she'd achieved when she'd pushed him towards the other side of the bed by promptly joining him there. "No, I mean, do people seem more receptive? A little more willing to accept what we're saying, Harry's side of the story?"
Remus nodded. "I think you're right. They're still scared, but they're listening." He propped himself up on one elbow, so he could see Tonks better. "Why, are people in the Ministry starting to talk?"
"Mm-hm. Very quietly, of course, because they could get in a lot of trouble. But already I've heard a couple of the Aurors saying Harry could have a point. And that's Aurors, Remus. The Ministry leans on us really hard to toe the line."
He smiled at her eager, earnest face. "I'm glad to hear it."
"It makes me feel like we could still win," she whispered. "When sometimes it's so hard to believe that. That's just like Harry, isn't it, to be giving all of us hope?"
– – – – –
It had been a long day. Remus brushed his cloak dry of outside's dismal drizzle as best he could and hung it up in the hallway. They'd finally got around to installing some coat hooks and tossing out that hideous troll's leg umbrella stand – Tonks' influence on the house, he thought with a smile.
Remus thought he'd go down to the kitchen and see if Sirius was around and up for a cup of tea and a bit of company, though lately Sirius had been retreating into the upper recesses of the house more and more. Just thinking about Sirius’ unhappiness in this house made the weight of the day press a little heavier on Remus' shoulders.
He took his time making his way downstairs, lost in thought, but when he reached the foot of the stairs, Remus stopped short.
Yes, Sirius was in the kitchen. So were Tonks and Molly and Arthur, though perhaps that wasn't so unusual, since they were all frequent visitors to the house.
But Kingsley and Moody were there too, all of them grouped around the table. On which a large, phoenix-shaped cake was ablaze with candles.
They were all looking at Remus. And smiling.
Remus' eyes went first to Tonks, who could barely contain her delight. "Oh, don't tell us you actually forgot what day it is!" she burst out, grinning madly.
Oh. It was the 10th of March.
"I – don't know what to say," Remus said.
As if that were the cue they had been waiting for, everyone in the room burst into a chorus of "Happy Birthday."
Feeling as if he were in a dream, Remus drifted towards the table. The men slapped him on the back, Molly enfolded him in a hug and Tonks gave him a friendly, chaste squeeze on the arm.
"Come on, make a wish," she urged. "And don't look at me, the cake was all Molly, you know I can't bake worth anything."
Remus looked down at the cake, then up at his friends, all watching him expectantly. Even Sirius looked content in this moment.
"Thank you for this," he said to them all.
"Just blow out the candles, old man," Sirius smirked. "No need to get sentimental on us." Sirius always had been able to scent a Remus Earnest Moment coming a mile off.
Remus looked in turn at each of their familiar faces, lit up with joy and love. Then he closed his eyes, took a deep breath and wished very hard for things to stay like this. Just like this.
– – – – –
(continue to CHAPTER FIFTEEN...)
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no subject
Date: 2014-12-07 02:41 am (UTC)This chapter really shows the stark contrast between the highs of developing love and the lows of war. It's no wonder Remus's emotions are all over the place. I love the glimpse we get of Tonks as seasoned Auror -- and it's sweet that Remus misses her when she's busy, and even goes so far as to admit that to himself. It's sad that Remus wants to keep their relationship secret, but it does seem like something he might do, possibly out of a wish for privacy, or (more likely) out of some misguided idea that even among the Order, it would be bad for Tonks if the others knew she was seeing him.
Loved Arthur's moment, and Remus realizing that people don't often take the time to ask him what he things.
no subject
Date: 2014-12-07 11:12 am (UTC)Oh, Remus, if you could only get your wish! Well, with the war ending, that is. ;)
Oh, man, I know. Writing Remus and Tonks really is an exercise in masochism sometimes, isn't it?